Dear 2012 - Please Go a Little Easy on Me!

Here is a teeny-weeny post for New Year's eve!!! :)

To say that 2011 was a mixed bag is an understatement, cos' I couldn't have asked for a better (or worse) mixture of happy and sad!

The year started off pretty good, at Tirupati! Then with a lots of ups and downs the year dragged on! Sometimes it reached the peak of happiness and sometimes exactly the opposite! Thereby, ending in a really confused place where I don't know if I should be thrilled and excited or extremely down and sad. Yup! I am confused, and rightfully so!!! But I will save the reasons for that in another post, on a another day.

Crimes Against Mallmunity

Mallmunity - Derived from the words "Mallu" (for Malayalees) and "Community"; it simply means the Mallu Community!

Crimes Against Mallmunity (C.A.M) - Things that happened to the people of Kerala though they never wanted to be a part of it.


CAM Scale - A lot like "Richter Scale" this is used to measure the damage done on a mallu mind. Therefore a 5.0 on the CAM Scale is less destructive than a 10.0 (which is total annihilation!)

The 80s - The Best Time to have been Born!

It all started with a post doing the rounds on Facebook saying, "If you were born in the 80s you are the greatest generation!". It got me thinking and it actually made sense.


I always thought that old people expect their next generation to go through hell, just cos' they went through it themselves. But now that I am old(er), I realize that maybe we did go through hell comparing to everything you have now, but it was so much more fun to have actually gone through it! Together!

It Is NOT Just a Watch!

The Year is 2000 (or Y2K as it was known then). I was in the 9th Grade. :)

We drove all the way from Muscat (Oman) to Dubai (U.A.E) for the Dubai Shopping Festival like we did every year. It was something that I looked forward to a lot. Spend time with family and a long drive. Dad was the driver. Mom occupied the front seat and the controls to the music system (which was a cassette player). Me and Sis' were on the back seat, screaming along with the lyrics of the latest Tamil and Hindi songs.

Y2K was the year when Casio's G-Shock watches were so popular that every hand sported one. Boys wore huge black ones while girls had small pink or red ones - but everyone had it. I secretly longed for one too, but did not ask!

Why Engineering, Why?

Ever since I was a kid, I was clear about one thing, I did NOT want to become a Engineer! No, Sir!

It is not because I thought Engineering is a lowly profession! But because I knew that engineering is not my cup of tea.

Why? Cos' I hate Mathematics. Period. Dobara Mat Poochna... (Don't you dare ask "Why?" again)

I wanted to steer clear of anything that was even remotely related to Mathematics.

Mom clearly understood. She felt sorry for me as I wrestled with 12 Grade C.B.S.E. Mathematics, trying to figure out the height of a frickin' lighthouse using Cos and Tan!

Kerala Dam Bursts, Millions Dead, Millions Homeless

Note: This post is NOT TRUE! Not yet, anyway! But given the state of the Mullaperiyar Dam this could be breaking news right now!

Special Correspondent
Any Time, Any Date, 2011

The never-ending dispute between the State Governments of Tamil Nadu and Kerala over the Mullaperiyar Dam has finally come to an abrupt end (as expected!) with the collapse of the Dam, killing millions of Keralites and washing away 5 complete districts (and partially affecting surrounding areas), into the Arabian Sea in under 10 minutes. The water from the reservoir is said to have reached speeds of ~120 kmph and above, as it seared through the heart of Kerala, washing away everything that stood in its way and completely flooding the districts of Idukki, Kottayam, Pathanamthitta, Ernakulam and some parts of Alappuzha.

WARDS - A Brotherhood Based on Equality

November 14 - Children's Day in India! A very special day for me, not just cos' I love kids, but cos' it is also my Dad's Birthday! :)

So what made 14 Nov' 2011 so special that I had to blog about it - Organized by my workplace (who are also sponsors), I spent a few hours with the kids at WARDS - Welfare Association for Rehabilitation of Disabled and Society!

What is the first thing that amazes you about WARDS?

Happy New Hair!

This is the story of "The Year of the Hair" and it is not a year in the Chinese calendar...

It is the year of MY hair... For someone who cared two hoots bout his own hair - 2011 was an eye-opener!

Thankfully I was blessed with great hair since I was a kid... And that is nothing special... Cos' like every mother, mine too took care of it... All I had to do was sit down and look cute for the camera as dad clicked away... :)

How Crazy Indians Drive!

August 2009, I shifted from the peaceful little town of Trivandrum (capital of the state of Kerala) to the bustling metro that is Bangalore (now Bengaluru) in Karnataka. Unlike the last time I was here (for 3 years, before I shifted back), this time I brought my motorcycle with me. But I was not prepared for the traffic here.

It was all fine, as long as it was only the ride on weekends. But on 01 August 2011, I joined my new job. It is about 28Kms from where I stay. So, I approximately travel about 60Kms per day since the last one month. And after a month of travelling in Bangalore traffic, I guess I cannot be wrong about what I am about to say.

The Wrath of 'Angry Birds'

If you are looking for entertainment – LEAVE NOW!

For, the situation is serious!

BREAKING NEWS – EGGS HAVE BEEN STOLEN!

The pigs feign innocence!!!

AND THE BIRDS ARE ANGRY!

"Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned/nor hell a fury like a bird scorned…”

They are out for blood… And they will stop at NOTHING!

The Cool New Freedom Struggle

You are probably wondering why all your Indian friends who posted only about their new-born calves in Farmville, are suddenly saying things like “Anna Hazare”, “Jan Lokpal”, “Freedom”, etc.. Do not be alarmed. We did get our Independence in 1947. If you are planning to travel to India, please do, because it is still peaceful and beautiful as ever (and we need the money you tourists bring, too! Hehe!!!). This is all about putting an end to the extremely corrupt state of our motherland. One man, Anna Hazare, started it. But thanks to the cool new style of freedom struggle, not only things are peaceful, but it is spreading like wildfire. We are people from the land of Mahatma Gandhi and we believe in peaceful revolution.

What the Hell is Freedom

It is a lazy Bangalore evening. I and my friend are on the bike, hunting for houses for rent in Indira Nagar area…

“Dude, we have been roaming since morning. Let’s go home. Will come back again tomorrow.” My friend moaned. Riding in Bangalore traffic is not an easy task.

“I have gotta go to office tomorrow, bro” I said through clenched teeth. The anger was at our lack of luck in finding a house. 

Ravi Varmas on Rails

Indian Railways – The central government-owned Bharatiya Rail is the fourth largest railway network in the world. It owns and operates most of the country's rail transport.

Raja Ravi Varma – An Indian painter – His works are considered to be among the best examples of the fusion of Indian traditions with the techniques of European academic art.

The connection between the two – NIL!

If I was a Cop ! ! !

This is a simple message. So I will keep it as simple as possible…

If you are looking for grandeur, you will find none here – cos I am just here to say – If I was a Cop, I would be Corrupt!

TV Series' That Rock

Declaration: Yup! I am starting with a declaration! The below list is my list – MY LIST! So if you don’t like it, well, I could not care less. Cos’ these are the ones I like. A’ght? Here we go!

Below are the ones that I CANNOT get enough of. According to me…

THE TOP FIVE TV SERIES’ ARE:

Attention Everybody ! ! !

All Tomb Raiders and Treasure Hunters sit up and pay attention!

Trivandrum is RICH!!!

The little city, where I was born, located at the southern most tip of India is suddenly under the spotlight. Why???

Prajwala – The Eternal Flame

I have been an avid follower of TED ever since the beginning. One lazy afternoon I watched a simple young woman walk on to the stage and the next 13 minutes were the biggest shock of my life.

Welcome to the Real World

Yes, I do know that the title is from the famous movie – The Matrix. And there is a reason for that. We now live in the time in which the line that divides the real world from technology has become so wispy that it is difficult to distinguish between the two.

Color Me Crazy ! ! !

Color [C] and Black and White [BW] sitting at a coffee shop, sipping well… hot coffee!

C: “Aah!!! What would the world do without me?”

BW: *Sighs* “We have had this conversation a countless times. Could you just drop it already?”

C: *smiles* It is true. But C just loved picking up a fight with BW. She knew that it always irritated BW who thought very highly of himself. “No, come on! Am I right or am I right?”

Something Your Economics Professor Did Not Tell You!

Please take 20 minutes off your schedule to watch this highly informative video.

Announcement

You are now reading the special bulletin of The Al-Qaeda Times. First of all, we would like to clarify that this bulletin and its contents were pre-approved by the United States of America and hence we cannot be held liable to any misquotes or wrong facts given here.

Hai! I am Endosulfan!

Hai! I am Endosulfan! I am sure that recently you are hearing a lot about getting rid of me. Well, to be honest, I am not worried. This has been going on since a very long time. As long as there are politicians, I am safe. So why do you hear so much about me these days, anyways? Let us start from the very beginning.

My Fav' Indian Song of All Time!!!

Info:

Movie: Anari

Cast: Raj Kapoor, Nutan, Lalita Pawar, Moti Lal, Mukri, Tiwari, Shobha

Music Director: Shankar-Jaikishan

Singer: Mukesh

Director: Hrishikesh Mukherjee

Producer: L.B.films

Lyrics: Shailendra

Year: 1959

Click "Read more" for the video and the lyrics to the song:

United We Stand

Cricket needs no introduction in India. And everyone who knows cricket – knows the Indian Premier League (IPL). Also mocked as the Indian Paisa League, the IPL became famous due to a number of reasons other than cricket – players from all over the world, cheerleaders, auctions, scams, Lalit Modi etc. People say that the gentleman’s game has been commercialized and that the IPL has nothing to do with quality cricket anymore.

Out-of-the-Loo Ideas!

“The next round will be Group-discussion”, she beamed as she said it as if she knew that she was screwing with us.

“What the…”

“Excuse me!” She looked at me with wide brown eyes

“No! My friend said that there will be no GD for this interview!” I stammered

“Well, that was the rules until last month. Our new HR manager has changed the process altogether. Is there a problem” It wasn’t a question. It was a statement.

Why the World Needs Superman!

I am no Lois Lane. And this is no Metropolis. So this is not going to get me the coveted Pulitzer! But I had to say this. I owe this much to my childhood (and adulthood) superhero.

Hush!

My nights have been sleepless since long. I blame it on fast unlimited internet connections and something called Peer-to-Peer networking. Movies and TV series have filled my life for the past 2 years that I forgot how nice it was to hold a book in my hand and read. That did not stop me from buying books though.

Women! Arrgh!!!

The year is 2003. Final year of graduation. Exams were a good one month away. There was a lot of time to study. There always is until the day before the exam. Me and my roommate decide to go for a walk. It is a cool Bangalore evening.

Politics, Movies, and Religion

A few weeks back I joined a few [new] friends at a party. A bunch of really great guys. They welcomed me [and a friend of mine] with open arms; it never felt like it was the first time with them. May I remind you something about “mallus”! We party! We party hard! And when we do, it most certainly involves alcohol! :)

The Quarrel ! ! !

“Why do I have to go?”

“You have to!” Mom was red and I could see that she was grinding her teeth together – she is really angry now.

“You know I hate all our relatives” I pleaded

The Letter ! ! !

It was really weird!

Why? I don’t know.

Somebody else would have been thrilled to see something like this.

“Take it. Read!” Dad raised his voice to bring me back to earth.

I gingerly extended my hand to take the very old piece of paper from him.

He beamed at me. “This was probably the last letter your grandfather wrote to me”, Dad said